Chapter 3
Sienna:
I put my hand on my stomach as I walked down the dimly lit street heading towards the apartment that I rented after finishing my last shift of the day. It was a long one, I had to admit that much. But no matter how much I wanted to deny it, I was thankful for the long days.
They kept me busy and they kept the thoughts, no matter how cruel, dark or painful they were away from my head.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart. Mommy’s going to keep you safe,” I whispered, speaking softly to my baby. I ran my finger over my stomach as I stared into space, not saying a word for a few moments.
The girls that I felt in my chest as I thought about how Damon did not even know that he was going to be a father was one that I couldn’t shake from my head, but I also knew what would happen if I told him. He wouldn’t let me keep the child. A baby born from a rejected mating bond was nothing more than complications to her mat last. He wanted to hide it. The fact that we were mates and that meant that he was going to force me to hide or even just let go of the baby if he found out.
I could already hear his voice, cold and unfeeling, telling me to get rid of it. He’d claim it was for the best, that it was to avoid questions about his relationship with Lysandra. It was a relationship that he chose to play and yet I was the one who was forced to suffer the consequences of it.
But even though things turned out the way that I did not want them to, there was no way in hell that I was going to allow him to have my child taken away from me. The baby was mine and I would protect my child. Even if it meant that I had to stand alone in this world. Even if it meant that I had to fight my battles alone.
For the last three months, one while I was still in the pack and two since I’d left, I’d been working hard to make sure I could give my baby a decent life. Losing the allowance Alpha Kael used to give me didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would. Thankfully, I’d saved most of it, originally planning to buy a car. But when I found out I was pregnant, everything changed.
Honestly, I didn’t mind. Starting a family of my own gave me a sense of purpose. A fresh start. That was something that gave me a sense of reason. At least it gave me a sense of pride and it showed me that I can do this by myself. Maybe that was the reason why I was given this.
No one from the pack knew about my job. As far as they were concerned, I was just a university student, busy with online classes and studying for exams. No one would care to look at me. No one would care to actually find out about anything that I did.
I balanced late-night studying with shifts during the day to make ends meet. It was exhausting, but it was worth it for the little life growing inside me.
On my way home, I stopped at a small grocery store to pick up a loaf of bread, a couple of water bottles, and jars of peanut butter and jelly, just enough to last for a few days. The less I spent on myself, the more I could save for the baby. And I knew that peanut butter would most likely be fulfilling enough to feed me as a pregnant woman. The Jelly was only an addition for sugar for me to be able to sustain and balance the taste of the peanut butter.
“That’ll be five dollars, ma’am,” the cashier said, her gaze lingering on my belly. She gave me a kind smile and added an extra loaf of bread and a small carton of milk to my bag. “These are on the house. Wishing you a safe delivery.”
“Thank you so much,” I said, genuinely touched by her kindness.
“You’re welcome,” she replied warmly.
I carried the bag back to my apartment, my stomach growling as I climbed the stairs. Hunger had become a constant companion. I’d lost weight over the past few months, but I had to stretch every dollar to make sure my baby stayed healthy.
Once inside, I locked the door and set the bag down. The apartment was small, just one room with a mini fridge, a bed, and a few secondhand pieces of furniture. It wasn’t much, but it was mine.
Sitting cross-legged on the floor, I rubbed my belly and smiled faintly. The smile was one that reached my eyes. Of course, it would. My baby was the one reason why I was willing to smile lately. Even the idea of my baby being in my arms was one that I couldn’t wait for.
“I know you’re hungry,” I murmured. “But this is all we’ve got right now. We have to save as much as we can for when you’re here. You know we have to be ready for everything that you are going to want and need, especially when you grow older.”
As I made myself a sandwich, I felt a strong kick. I giggled despite the ache that followed. It was an ache that I got used to, but it was one that I fell in love with.
“You’ve got some strength in you, little wolf,” I said softly, rubbing my belly. “I promise I’ll give you the love I never got. I’ll keep you safe, no matter what.”
After eating, I tucked the rest of the groceries into the mini fridge. That little fridge had been my first big purchase when I moved here, and it felt like a lifeline. One that I found myself being thankful for.
I headed to the bedroom, flicked on the light, and dusted off the bed before changing into comfy pajamas. My wolf had grown weaker over time, and even though wolves usually ran hotter than humans, I still felt cold. I slid on a pair of thick socks to keep my feet warm.
“Good night, little one. Try to let Mommy sleep, okay? We’ve got a big day tomorrow,” I whispered, climbing into bed.
Another kick made me laugh softly, even as the ache lingered.
“I love you too, my little wolf.” I said, cradling my belly as I drifted off.