The Name in My Dreams (Part 1)
Thea’s POV
I jerked awake, my heart racing as consciousness slammed into me like a freight train. Something had pulled me from my sleep–a dream, maybe? Or was it a memory fragment breaking through? Whatever it was remained frustratingly blurry, the images refusing to solidify in my mind.
But one thing came through with crystal clarity: a name.
Kane.
The name echoed in my head, persistent and demanding attention. I carefully extracted
myself from Sebastian’s arms and sat up, trying not to wake him. Who the fuck was Kane?
Did I know him? Was he important to me? Questions swirled in my mind as I tried to
make sense of why this particular name had managed to penetrate the wall blocking my
memories.
Moonlight streamed through our bedroom window, casting everything in an eerie glow that only heightened my unease after that fragmented dream. A shiver ran down my spine
as I reached over and switched on the bedside lamp, needing to chase away the shadows.
“Thea? What’s wrong?” Sebastian’s sleep–roughened voice made me turn toward him.
Holy shit, he looked good. All sleepy–eyed with his hair rumpled and that perfectly sculpted chest on full display. I couldn’t help swallowing hard as I took in the sight. There
was no denying Sebastian Ashworth was a walking work of art–a sexy–as–hell work of art
at that.
“Thea?” he prompted again, pulling me from my appreciative trance.
Should I tell him? It had been several days since I’d woken up, but I still couldn’t shake
the feeling that he was keeping something from me. Something big. And somehow, my gut told me that whoever Kane was, Sebastian probably wasn’t his biggest fan.
Things between us had been going so well, and I was terrified of fucking it all up. I bit my lip, holding back the question that wanted to spill out. But God, I needed to know who this man was and why his name had pierced through that wall in my head.
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The Name in My Dreams (Part 1)
Sebastian sat up in bed and turned to face me, bringing us eye to eye. His hand landed on my bare arm, sending a shiver through me that had nothing to do with the cool night air. I couldn’t help imagining what those hands would feel like exploring every inch of my body. I actually ached for it.
Taking a deep breath, I tried to calm my racing pulse. This was all so new. I still hadn’t fully accepted that his feelings for me were real, so jumping into bed with him—well, more than just sleeping–probably wasn’t the smartest move.
I rubbed my face with my hands and decided to just be honest with him. “I just woke up
from a dream that I think was a memory,” I said softly, noticing how his body instantly tensed beside me but appreciating that he didn’t pull away. That raised an eyebrow.
“Do you remember what it was about?” His voice held a note of hesitation.
There it was again. That subtle indication that he was hiding something, or that there
were things he hoped I wouldn’t remember.
I studied him carefully, but his expression remained unreadable. Sighing, I shook my
head.
“No, I don’t remember what it was.” I heard his slight exhale of relief. “But there was a
name that kept echoing in my mind.”
He tensed again. The man really sucked at playing it cool. If you only looked at those cold
eyes and expressionless face, you’d think he didn’t give a shit, but I knew Sebastian… I knew that right now, for whatever reason, he was nervous.
“What name?” he asked.
“Kane.” I paused, staring at my hands before meeting his gaze again. “Who is he? Do you
know him?”
The waves of tension rolling off him were impossible to miss. He was forcing himself to
relax, and that captured my full attention. He always kept his emotions in check, so seeing him like this… struggling with whatever was bothering him, made him seem more real.
I saw the hesitation in his eyes. He was debating whether to tell me something. Seeing this, I reached for his clenched fist resting on the covers.
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The Name in My Dreams (Part 1)
“Sebastian, who is Kane?”
He took a deep breath, then let it out slowly.
“He’s Phoenix’s father.”
That simple sentence shocked me into silence. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Since waking up, I’d been wondering about Phoenix’s father. Now I had an answer, but I had no
idea what to do with it.
How I ended up pregnant with another man’s child was still a mystery that haunted me. I
knew myself, and I knew I would never betray Sebastian. I loved him too much.
Unless I had completely changed as a person, I couldn’t imagine myself with any other
man.
“You told me I never cheated, so what’s the deal with this Kane? How did I end up with
him?” I asked.
Since we were already on the topic, I might as well get answers and resolve this issue that had been bothering me.
The Name in My Dreams (Part 2)-1
Thea’s POV
He was silent for a moment, and I stayed quiet too. I waited for him to gather his thoughts. I could tell he genuinely loved Phoenix, but I could also see that Kane was a sensitive subject for him.
I wondered what Kane had done to piss Sebastian off, and why I’d slept with him. Was it my way of getting back at Sebastian for not loving me? You know, sleeping with someone
he disliked.
I wasn’t usually a vengeful person, but I also understood that pain and heartbreak could drive a person to do things they normally wouldn’t.
“When Aurora came back, I wanted to be with her,” he began.
Hearing him say it hurt like hell, but I’d always known this would happen when she returned. I just hadn’t expected it to sting this much.
“I knew it wouldn’t be good for Leo if we suddenly ended things. We needed to ease him into the idea of us no longer being together. You agreed, and I started seeing Aurora secretly, preparing for our separation.”
I watched him intently, hanging on every word. I didn’t want him to see my pain, so I hid
it behind a mask of indifference.
“You met Kane at Derek’s funeral–he saved you. He was one of the cops assigned by the police department to keep order. Threats had been made, and they couldn’t risk more
deaths.”
I frowned because nothing he was saying resonated with me. Where my memories should be, there was only emptiness.
“What do you mean he saved me?” I asked curiously.
“There was another Rogue attack during the funeral. A Rogue got hold of you, and if Kane hadn’t lunged at you, you might have died.”
Well, he did a nice thing for a stranger. I guess that was our “how I met your mother”
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The Name in My Dreams (Part 2)-1
story… but where was Sebastian during all this?
Before I could ask, he continued: “I don’t know the specifics; I just know you two started
dating. Honestly, it made me jealous. I couldn’t understand why, but seeing you with
another man bothered me. I wanted to tear him apart.”
The way his fists clenched was enough to prove this still bothered him a great deal. I never thought Sebastian would be so jealous and possessive of me, so this was completely
unexpected.
“I hadn’t yet understood my feelings for you, so when you told me about him, I agreed our marriage should be open. It didn’t seem fair to keep you from him when I was pursuing another woman myself.”
Fuck. Why did it hurt so much to hear him say that? It was obvious he had been ready to throw me away for Aurora. I always knew it was inevitable, so I don’t know why it hurt so
badly.
As for Kane, I really didn’t get it. Had he caught my attention enough that I would bring this up to Sebastian, or was I just trying to make Sebastian jealous? Maybe trying to get a
reaction from him.
What was so special about this Kane that he could do what other men couldn’t? What was it about him that attracted me so much that we even had sex?
“I was seeing Aurora, and you were seeing Kane, but every thought in my mind was occupied by you,” he exhaled, running a hand through his disheveled hair. “Honestly, it was funny. When Aurora came back, I thought you would be my problem like when we were younger. When you weren’t, I was surprised. You seemed not to care at all. It turned out I was the problem because for some reason, I couldn’t let you go.”
Was I really like that? My world had once revolved around Sebastian and Leo. It was strange to hear him say I seemed completely unbothered by him dating Aurora.
“So Kane and I dated for a few months?” I asked.
The Name in My Dreams (Part 2)-2
“Then I must have had sex with him during that time, which explains how I got pregnan Didn’t we use protection?” I voiced my thoughts, completely forgetting that Sebastian wa
right beside me.
He growled low in his throat, saying through gritted teeth, “Thea, please don’t mention
you, another man, and sex in the same sentence. I don’t even want to think about it.”
I couldn’t even imagine another man’s hands on me, so I kept silent. It was still difficult
for me to accept that another man had once touched and tasted me. To accept that
another man had once been inside my body was hard.
Pushing those thoughts away, I focused on him and asked the question I was afraid to
hear the answer to.
“What about you? Did you sleep with Aurora?”
My heart pounded painfully as I waited for his answer.
Sharp green eyes pierced into mine as he answered, “No. I didn’t have sex with her. I didn’t even kiss her because it felt fucking wrong.”
Yet I had slept with another man. Would he see me and Phoenix differently because of it?
“I’m sorry for letting another man touch me,” I said quietly, feeling ashamed.
He gently grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at him. Stroking my cheek, he placed a light kiss at the corner of my mouth, then his green eyes found mine again.
“That’s not your fault, never apologize for it. If not for your relationship with Kane, Phoenix wouldn’t be here, and I will never regret having that little girl because she has a part of my heart.”
This touched me so deeply that I couldn’t help leaning in to kiss his lips. I threaded my fingers through his hair, pulling him closer. Our mouths tangled together, and my desire skyrocketed. Fuck, I wanted him so badly.
Without breaking the kiss, I emerged from under the covers and straddled his hips. The evidence of his arousal pressed against my wet center.
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The Name in My Dreams (Part 2)-2
My panties were soaked through, clinging to my opening, but that didn’t stop me from grinding against his hardness. The moan he let out traveled through my entire body. I swear I could probably climax just from that sexy sound alone.
Nothing made more sense than what was happening between us. What were we talking about before? I was sure it wasn’t important, right? When his tongue was in my mouth, his hard length rubbing against my center, and his hands squeezing my ass, nothing in this world mattered more than what was happening between us right now.
I was about to pull off my nightgown when he stopped me.
“No,” his voice was firm and restrained.
“Why? Don’t you want me?” I asked, confused.
His hardness told me he did want me. Unless his excitement wasn’t because of me.
“You’re testing my control, Thea.” He sighed, “Fuck, of course I want you, but that would be taking advantage of you.”
He lifted me off his lap with one arm and set me on the bed. Then he got up and walked
toward the bathroom.
“I don’t understand,” I called after him, making him pause.
He didn’t turn around, but he answered: “When I take you, I want you to believe in my feelings for you; I want to be the only one you want, the only one on your mind; I want to be the only one in your heart, and I want you to have nothing but love for me. Only then will I take you and mark you as mine.”
With that, he walked into the bathroom, leaving me staring after him, more confused than
ever.
What did he mean by wanting me to have nothing but love for him? Had something happened to make me hate him? And if Kane was Phoenix’s father, where was he now?
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